Friday, December 31, 2010

2010

It's the end of the year again, everyone! The time of year when everyone makes top ten lists and creates new year's resolutions and buys party hats and alcohol in preparation for the big celebration that takes place in order to count down from sixty and watch a giant ball drop (a tradition that I still don't really understand but enjoy celebrating).
Anyway, it's also the time when people think back on what they've done the past year. Including me. Which is why I'm making a list some big things from this year of my life that I want to remember. Or maybe don't want to remember, but I'll include them anyway. I wrote one last year, which you can find on my other blog that's no longer in use if you really want. But you probably don't, so I will continue. =)

-Saw my favorite artist and my favorite band live
-Paid $90 for a concert ticket, the most I will EVER pay
-Saw In The Heights and Spring Awakening on stage, cried, got chills, and fell in love with each of them
-Got my driver's license
-Got my heart broken for the first time
-FINALLY read Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
-Became obsessed with Harry Potter and became part of the fandom
-Started my own wizard rock band
-Saw my first wizard rock concert
-Met some of my role models
-Met two of the Five Awesome Girls
-Was in
-Met my first (and second) internet friend IRL
-Participated in my second Project for Awesome
-WON my first NaNoWriMo, leaving me with 50,000 of an actual novel
-Discovered a passion for writing
-Decided I want to be an author
-Participated in HPAFTW and made some amazing new friends that I talk to every day (I love you Marauders!)
-Lived my last year as a teenager
-Failed my first two classes EVER
-Went to a club for the first time
-Learned how to salsa dance
-Tried Chipotle for the first time and loved it
-Heard a family member sing on the radio
-Got bangs for the first time since fourth grade
-Made a video with my friends that was watched by one of my biggest role models
-Got Twitter-engaged ;)
-Met an actor who played a lead character on a show I used to watch all the time
-Learned what it's like to have less than five dollars to my name
-Watched friends and family travel abroad or across the country while I stayed home
-Made plans to GET OUT!
-Changed my major to something I've always wanted, and then decided I wanted something else even more
-Started making videos on Youtube
-Dressed up for a Harry Potter midnight release for the first time
-Started teaching myself to play guitar
-Went from actual depression to becoming more happy and proud and comfortable with myself than I ever have been

Thanks, 2010. You've been so good to me. I can't wait to see what 2011 has waiting, and I can't wait to do all the things I already have planned for it.

I hope 2010 treated all of you just as well, and I hope 2011 treats you even better. =)
DFTBA

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Learning How to Be Happy

I know it's been a while since I've posted, because I've been extremely lazy lately. I kept WANTING to post, but I didn't feel like with coming up with anything interesting to talk about. However, I'm feeling really good right now and I kind of wanted to share the feeling, especially with anyone who might be struggling with or going through the same thing that I have.
Lately, I've been feeling pretty bad about myself. I've been feeling really down on myself in a lot of ways. I felt like I wasn't good enough for anything, a problem that, up until recently, I haven't really had. At least, not to this extent. There was no one reason for these feelings, but I think one of the big contributing factors was loneliness.
As you might remember if you read my blog during BEDA, I had a post about how I had been feeling pretty lonely and upset. That feeling didn't go away. For the longest time, I believed that there must be a REASON why I'm lonely. If I feel lonely, it must be because people don't value me enough to make me feel otherwise. If a friend flakes on plans, it must be because I'm not interesting enough or enough fun to hang out with. If I don't have a boyfriend, it must be because I'm not attractive enough or cool enough or because I'm too awkward or unappealing.
Let me tell you, the best feeling in the world is finally realizing, and BELIEVING, that these things aren't true.
Beginning to believe that I'm not the inadequate person I thought I was did not require a change in the way I looked, a change in who I was, or a change in my relationship status. It just required a change of perspective.
Today, my best friend Sarah and I were talking. Both of us were feeling ESPECIALLY bad, dealing with these same feelings of inadequacy. I had just read a very good (very romantic) book, and for some reason, upon finishing it, I was depressed, lonely, and annoyed with myself. I felt like I would never have a relationship like the one in the book, and that was all I wanted. And on top of that, I was irritated with myself for feeling that way. I told Sarah about this and we had been venting back and forth about it to each other for a while, trying to figure out a way to fix it, when suddenly it came to me. We were upset because we were letting circumstances we had no control over determine our happiness. And then I asked myself why. Why is it that in order to feel like I matter, I need everyone to like me or be my best friend? Why is it that I feel like I need a guy in my life to make me feel valid? Why is it that I need everything to work out exactly the way I want it in order to be happy with my life?
Then I realized the answer: I don't.
Suddenly, I felt so much better about everything. For lack of a better, less clichéd phrase, I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off of me. And I felt excited. Happy.
So I texted Sarah back telling her exactly this. That I'm done letting ANYONE (or the lack of anyone, like certain friends or a boyfriend) make me unhappy. I'm done letting other people or circumstances determine my happiness, or make me feel unworthy or undeserving of being happy and confident and proud of who I am. Both of us decided that we are going to stop letting this kind of thing get to us. As long as we are happy with who we are, why do we need other people to make us feel good about ourselves?
If you don't like yourself, a million friends or thousands of Twitter followers or an attractive boyfriend or a ton of subscribers on Youtube aren't going to make happier with yourself. And if you do like yourself, it's not because you have any of those things, and you don't need those things to continue to be happy. So why worry about it? Why stress yourself out? Why let other people change the way you see yourself?
I can't think of a good enough reason why. So maybe there is no reason good enough. And that is what I'm going to keep in mind from now on.
And if you are struggling with this same problem, ask yourself that same question.
Think of the most beautiful person you know. If they didn't (or don't) have a boy/girlfriend to tell them how beautiful they are, would that make them ugly?
Think of the funniest person you know. If no one was there laughing at their jokes, would that make them any less funny?
Think of your favorite author, singer, actor, athlete, etc. If they didn't have fans admiring their work, would that make them any less talented?
Or the most intelligent or kind or genuine person you know. If people don't tell them how smart or nice they are, does that make them any less so?
Would these people be any different if they weren't always reassured about themselves? I don't see a single reason why they would be.
John and Hank Green wouldn't be any less giving and kind and caring without the nerdfighters. Hayley G. Hoover wouldn't be any less hilarious or intelligent without 41,717 Youtube subscribers. Maureen Johnson wouldn't be less funny or a worse writer without her 22,398 Twitter followers and 10 published novels. Charlie McDonnell wouldn't be any less adorable or awesome if he didn't have thousands of girls fangirling over his every move.
So really, who needs all that stuff? If you have it, congratulations. That's awesome and wonderful, because you've probably worked really hard to get it and if you have, you deserve it. But if you don't, so what? You're just as awesome and worthy of confidence and happiness as anyone who does. So cheer up and stop being so down on yourself! Trust me, it feels amazing.

Also, Marauders? I AM A PICKLE.

Currently reading: Charmed Thirds by Megan McCafferty.(But I JUST TODAY finished Anna and the French Kiss by Stephanie Perkins. It was fantastic, so I have to mention it.)
Song of the Day: Details in the Fabric- Jason Mraz ft. James Morrison

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

NoMoreWriMo

Well, everyone, it's officially December 1st.
This means several things.
It means that there are only a few short weeks (which will undoubtedly feel like months) until Christmas.
It means that snow is soon to be covering the ground.
It means Starbucks is serving delicious Christmas flavored coffees.
It means that adorable Christmas lights and decorations and trees are being put up everywhere.
It means that Pomplamoose Christmas Hyundai commercials are being sprinkled throughout the breaks in your television shows.
It means that in 16 days, it will be time for Project for Awesome and spam-wowing countless Youtube charity videos while watching hilarious Youtubers talk to you for 48 hours straight and neglecting to study for your finals.
And this year, for the first in my life, it means that I am an official NaNoWriMo winner.
This novel that I have made a priority over sleep, hygiene, homework, life in general . . . it is now over 50,000 words long, leaving me feeling extremely accomplished and very unsure of what to do with all my time now that it's over.
Of course, my novel isn't finished, and it won't be finished for a while. But without a deadline like I had during November, and without the excuse to pull all-nighters and ignore everything I should be doing because I have to meet my word count goal, this novel is going to be much more difficult and much less crazy to write. Which is simultaneously good and bad.
Although I do really enjoy this novel, it was difficult enough during NaNoWriMo to find the motivation to write it. But it there's one thing I've learned about writing, it's that you can be completely bored with your novel one minute, and absolutely in love with it the next. And during the boring, exhausting parts, you just have to slog through and know that the excitement is waiting, ready to pounce on you at any moment. Same with anything you do. Nothing is fun all the time. But the really great things are worth the boring parts.
Now, if you'll excuse me, it's 4:30 am and I haven't slept much this past week.
Not that I'm tired. I just kind of feel obligated to sleep.

Song of the Day: Deck the Halls- Pomplamoose Version
Currently (re)reading: A Great and Terrible Beauty by Libba Bray

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

It Gets Better

Alright, here we go. I said I'd be giving you a blog post soon and considering what is going on all over internetland right now, I thought I would put my two cents in in my post.

I'm sure you've heard the heartbreaking story about the gay teens that recently committed suicide due to bullying. While we unfortunately can't get back the lives of these teens, we can prevent this tragedy from happening to other teens. That's what we are attempting to do now.

You may have heard of the "It Gets Better" campaign. Its purpose is to reassure LGBT teens that, despite hard times they might be going through, despite bullying they might be suffering through, despite discrimination and hate and pain, it DOES get better. Many people are making Youtube videos and posting blogs about their stories and how things got better for them. I, personally, don't have a story to share about it, but I do have opinions on the matter.

I am a strong Christian, and often, Christians have a bad reputation when it comes to homosexuality. There are Christians who spread around so much hate that people start to believe that Christianity is full of high-and-mighty people who hate gay people; that God hates gay people; that Christians believe that people who are gay are worth less than people who are straight.

Listen up. I am here to tell you that NONE of this is true.

Sure, there are Christians who believe all of this. But aren't their non-Christians who believe horrible things as well?

I was brought up in the church, and the one thing that was reiterated constantly was love.
"Love your neighbor as yourself." (Mark 12:31)
"Hatred stirs up dissension, but love covers over all wrongs." (Proverbs 10:12)
"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." (1 Corinthians 13:13)

And not only are we told to love each other, but we are told that "So God created man in his own image" (Genisis 1:27) and therefore, loves every single one of us equally, no matter what we do.
My favorite verse on the subject is Romans 8:38-39: "And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord." How can you read this and believe that God hates anyone?

John 3:16, the very first Bible verse I ever remember learning by heart, tells us the God loves all of us so much, that He sent His son to save us for our sins. He didn't do this just for the righteous or the "sinless" (as if there is such a thing) or for the people that followed Him. He did this for every single person, and if we love and follow and accept Him, we will reap the benefits of it.

I know there is a lot of controversy about whether or not homosexuality is a sin, and I'm not getting into that in this post. But I am absolutely positive that one thing is true: gay or straight, black or white, religious or not, God loves you more than you can possibly comprehend. And He wants us to love every single person equally, the way He loves us all equally. Do you think He is pleased to see young people killing themselves because others are mercilessly bullying them? Do you think He is pleased to see people bullying others, period? I'm certain he isn't. No matter what someone has done wrong, God does not want us to treat that person with hate, but with love.

This post is simply to tell everyone that Christians are not hateful, whatever negative image we might have. Some Christians believe homosexuality is a sin and some don't, but either way, we are told to love everyone despite their sins, because who among us is free of sin? "Therefore you have no excuse, whoever you are, when you judge others; for in passing judgment on another you condemn yourself, because you, the judge, are doing the very same things." Romans 2:1


Also, here is the "It Gets Better" video that inspired this post. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U8J93a2IES4&feature=sub

Love to you all of you.


Song of the Day: Teenage Dream- BoyceAvenue cover
Currently reading: An Abundance of Katherines by John Green

Monday, October 18, 2010

More Book Giveways?

Yes! More book giveaways! Another giveaway is going on right on my friend Katie's blog, and this time it is for a book I REALLY want. I've been wanting to read this book since I finished The Mortal Instruments a few weeks ago, but haven't been able to afford to buy it, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed for this giveaway! If you want to read it, too, you should enter! Cassandra Clare is a fantastic author and knows how to keep you hooked better than almost anyone else. Do yourself a favor and head on over to http://dft.ba/-CAgiveaway and enter!

Back-to-normal blog post coming soon.

Enjoy, lovelies!

Song of the Day: Don't Blame Me- Mike Lombardo
Currently Reading: An Abundance of Katherines by John Green

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

BOOK GIVEAWAYS!

Hey guys!

Now, I am a HUGE reader. I always have book in my purse, no matter what. Every free moment I have I'm reading. I fangirl books and authors the way some people fangirl (fanboy?) athletes or authors or musicians. So when I heard that two of my friends, Bianca and Faith, were having book giveaways on their blogs, I was super excited!
I know many of you who read this (basically my friends) are also big readers, so I thought I'd let you know!

Here are the links to enter- do it soon, because they're almost over!

Bianca's: http://nyxensadventure.blogspot.com/2010/09/nyxens-birthday-bash-giveaway.html

Faith's: http://machasebookreviews.blogspot.com/2010/09/tyger-tyger-giveaway.html

Enjoy, guys! And thanks!

Song of the Day: Saved- ALLCAPS
Currently Reading: City of Glass by Cassandra Clare

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Day 31: Here's Lookin' at You, Kid

You all know what today is.
Today is August 31, 2010.
(Fun fact: I just typed 2009. It is August and I still am unsure of the year.)
This means that today is also the last day of BEDA.
It's a sad, sad day.
I still have to find a monologue so I don't really have a lot of time, but I will definitely keep blogging (not every day, but more often than before!) and I will also keep making videos as much as I can. I've had a lot of fun this month exploring blogging and vlogging and just putting myself out there. I've also enjoyed reading everyone else's blogs and comments and learning more about them! I can't wait for April to do this again. =)

Also, tomorrow is September 1st, which means . . . 2 months until NaNoWriMo! I'm sooo excited for it. I'm already trying to think of ideas for my novel. I will WIN this year! November also marks the anniversary of me becoming a Nerdfighter. I can not tell you how much this community means to me and how much fun I have had now that I've been part of it. I love everybody in Nerdfighteria and all the amazing people that I've met, and how accepting and helpful and caring everyone I've met has been.

Don't even get me started on the Harry Potter fandom. That's a rambling for another day.

So, I'm gonna stop procrastinating and actually find a monologue so I can memorize it by tomorrow night. I'll catch y'all on the flip side.

Song of the Day: Me and Milee- ALLCAPS
(Look at that! Two ALLCAPS songs in a row and not even on purpose!)