"Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light."
-Dylan Thomas
These lines from a poem by Dylan Thomas stuck out to me the other day. Maybe I should start taking this advice. I'm not talking about "the dying of the light" as the ending my life (as it is used in the context of the poem), but rather the things in life--relationships, hobbies, passions, goals, dreams, etc.--that you want to keep forever but sometimes, as life moves along, you lose. I lose so many of the things I hold dear to me, but many times I feel like I let them go without a fight. So many things I'm not ready to let go of, but I don't exert enough effort to keep them from slipping away. I let them go gently into the good night. But should I?
I don't like change. I never have. I don't handle it well. And yet, when I encounter a significant change, do I do anything to stop it? To hold on to that thing I want so badly to keep in my life? To rage against the dying of that friendship or that dream of being on Broadway or that habit of writing every day or that goal of getting all As or that passion for photography? I don't. I do nothing but shrug my shoulders and bite my lip and watch them disappear from my life.
I'm not saying change is bad; it can lead to wonderful things. But not everything has to change. Sometimes consistency is a good thing. I just wonder why I don't fight harder to keep my life the way it was, especially when the way it was made me so much happier than the way it is. Sometimes I'm so much happier with who I was before than with who I am now.
I guess the time has come to learn how to be a fighter. Maybe I can learn to fight for the things I don't want to lose, and fight for the things I want back. Shouldn't be too hard, right?
P.S. Once school gets out, my blogs will be back up to their usual quality. Just been really busy with end-of-the-school-year everything, which is why I'm giving you lots of short posts and blow-off posts and really unnecessary things. Sorry about that. Love you all.<3
Currently reading: Survival in Auschwitz by Primo Levi
Song of the Day: Beautiful Things- Gungor
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Day 10: AHHHHH
So, I just met with Chris, the director of the Recreation and Fitness Center on campus. Apparently, Valerie (a friend of mine who does social media for them) read my blog post about my Disney fitness class idea and loved it, showed it to her bosses (who also loved it) and then told me that those bosses wanted to meet with me as soon as possible to talk about it. So that is what happened today.
I told Chris about my idea and he said he loved it and was really excited about it. He then asked me if I could put together a 20-30 minute sample class and, sometime before the end of next week, teach this sample class to a few of the fitness instructors there. This would be my "interview" of sorts. If they like it and think I can handle it, they want to put me on the schedule for the spring/summer semesters. In other words, I WOULD BEGIN IN JUST A FEW WEEKS.
I. Am. Freaking. Out.
I am so excited about this idea and so happy that it might actually happen. God is definitely smiling on me, because He is furthering this along far more quickly than I would have imagined. However, I AM SO NERVOUS. Not only have I never officially taught anything before (I help teach a song I helped choreograph in Zumba, and I've helped teach the routines in choir back in high school, but that's it), but I have also never done any real choreography. I don't even know if I CAN do choreography. And now I have about a week to choreograph my whole class. TERRIFYING, let me tell you. Thrilling, but terrifying.
Soooooo I have class in ten minutes, but I really just wanted to tell you all about this. I am so excited and so nervous and so adslfkjsadkfj. This is just crazy as heck and fast and new and I'm sorry for the rambly post but ahhhhhh! Okay. Talk to you guys tomorrow. <3
Currently reading: Survival in Auschwitz by Primo Levi
Song of the Day: Love Don't Roam cover- Halia Meguid
I told Chris about my idea and he said he loved it and was really excited about it. He then asked me if I could put together a 20-30 minute sample class and, sometime before the end of next week, teach this sample class to a few of the fitness instructors there. This would be my "interview" of sorts. If they like it and think I can handle it, they want to put me on the schedule for the spring/summer semesters. In other words, I WOULD BEGIN IN JUST A FEW WEEKS.
I. Am. Freaking. Out.
I am so excited about this idea and so happy that it might actually happen. God is definitely smiling on me, because He is furthering this along far more quickly than I would have imagined. However, I AM SO NERVOUS. Not only have I never officially taught anything before (I help teach a song I helped choreograph in Zumba, and I've helped teach the routines in choir back in high school, but that's it), but I have also never done any real choreography. I don't even know if I CAN do choreography. And now I have about a week to choreograph my whole class. TERRIFYING, let me tell you. Thrilling, but terrifying.
Soooooo I have class in ten minutes, but I really just wanted to tell you all about this. I am so excited and so nervous and so adslfkjsadkfj. This is just crazy as heck and fast and new and I'm sorry for the rambly post but ahhhhhh! Okay. Talk to you guys tomorrow. <3
Currently reading: Survival in Auschwitz by Primo Levi
Song of the Day: Love Don't Roam cover- Halia Meguid
Day 9: I keep forgetting.
I keep forgetting about this whole blogging thing until right before I go to bed. I have things to tell you but I would rather wait until tomorrow when I know more, so I'll just tell you all that I watched How to Train Your Dragon for the first time today and I am in love with it. Cutest movie in the world. And I have a cartoon-crush on Hiccup (don't judge, you know you have them). And Toothless reminds me of my cat. That is all for tonight.
So sorry for slacking on you guys. I'll try to do better. <3
So sorry for slacking on you guys. I'll try to do better. <3
Monday, April 9, 2012
Day 8
This is the post that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on, my friends. Some people started reading it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue reading it forever just because this is the post that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on, my friends. Some people started reading it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue reading it forever just because this is the post that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on, my friends. Some people started reading it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue reading it forever just because this is the post that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on, my friends. Some people started reading it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue reading it forever just because this is the post that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on, my friends. Some people started reading it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue reading it forever just because this is the post that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on, my friends. Some people started reading it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue reading it forever just because this is the post that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on, my friends. Some people started reading it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue reading it forever just because this is the post that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on, my friends. Some people started reading it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue reading it forever just because this is the post that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on, my friends. Some people started reading it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue reading it forever just because this is the post that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on, my friends. Some people started reading it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue reading it forever just because this is the post that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on, my friends. Some people started reading it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue reading it forever just because this is the post that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on, my friends. Some people started reading it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue reading it forever just because this is the post that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on, my friends. Some people started reading it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue reading it forever just because this is the post that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on, my friends. Some people started reading it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue reading it forever just because this is the post that never ends . . .
Sunday, April 8, 2012
Day 7: This is . . .
. . . me with the Easter bunny. (Taken by my stepmom) 
. . . a ridiculous number of plastic eggs on a football field.
. . . photobombing.
. . . the Magnolia tree in my front yard. It blooms once a year for a week or two.
. . . a dog wearing a vest.
. . . a cop out post. I am lazy and tired and had no idea what to write today so I decided to take advantage of the fact that I photographed our church's Easter egg hunt this morning.
I apologize.
Currently reading: Survival in Auschwitz by Primo Levi
Song of the Day: Call Me Maybe- Carly Rae Jepsen
. . . a ridiculous number of plastic eggs on a football field.
. . . photobombing.
. . . the Magnolia tree in my front yard. It blooms once a year for a week or two.
. . . a dog wearing a vest.
. . . a cop out post. I am lazy and tired and had no idea what to write today so I decided to take advantage of the fact that I photographed our church's Easter egg hunt this morning.
I apologize.
Currently reading: Survival in Auschwitz by Primo Levi
Song of the Day: Call Me Maybe- Carly Rae Jepsen
Saturday, April 7, 2012
Day 6: Something worth leaving behind.
"You are valuable because you exist. Not because of what you do or what you have done, but simply because you are."
-Max Lucado
Do you ever wonder what the point is? Do you ever wonder if you'll ever be anything more than what you are?
When I was little, my mom used to tell me I was special. The same way, I suppose, that all mothers tell their children they're special. But I always believed her because of the story that went along with it. You see, before I came along, my mom was pregnant with her first child, Jamie. Jamie, unfortunately, never made it into the world. You can imagine the disappointment and heartbreak expectant parents feel when this happens, but God always has a plan, through the good times and the bad. Shortly afterward, my mom found out she was pregnant with me.
So she always used to tell me that there was a reason I was born instead. That although it was painful for her to lose Jamie, if she hadn't, I wouldn't be here. And that, she told me, made me special. It meant I was here for a particular reason. It meant that I would be important. And this made sense to me. It truly made me believe that I was destined for great things. That I would make a difference in the world. That I really would, someday, be special.
As I grew up I came to realize that there was nothing particularly interesting or different about me. I didn't feel special yet. I had big dreams, though, and I held on to those dreams, thinking they would be the difference. If I just followed my heart, kept my plans, chased my dreams, and didn't give up, I would become someone and I would find that meaning I was longing to find. The reason I was here.
Recently, I've been struggling with a similar feeling. The why-am-I-here feeling. Feeling like maybe there's no point to my life; after all, I've never done anything of worth, and who's to say I ever will? What if I never do anything of worth? What if I'm running out of time? During an emotional conversation with my mom last weekend, this feeling made a reappearance, and I mentioned it to her. She replied that it wasn't about me; whether or not I did something people would remember or did something that changed the world wasn't the important thing. It was about God and His plan, and He knows what he's doing. Every person on this Earth was put here for a reason, and each and every one one of us has a purpose. Just because you're not aware of what it is doesn't mean it doesn't exist. After all, you have no idea of the lives you've touched in your lifetime. You have no idea of who you've affected and how you've done so, or who may have had a better life, day, or even just couple of moments because of something you've done.
And I realize that she's right. I may never do anything that will change the course of history. I may never cure a disease, step onto a Broadway stage, paint a valuable painting, voice a Disney character, travel into space, write a book that makes people think differently about things. But somehow, sometime, to someone, I will make a difference. And isn't that reason enough to believe that I matter?
It's hard sometimes, to remember that your life isn't all about you and whether or not people will remember your name. It's about so many more things. You, of course, are an extremely important part of it. But it's also about every person you come in contact with, everything you do, and the One who gave you life. Sometimes it just takes remembering this to see how much you mean.
Currently reading: Survival in Auschwitz by Primo Levi (Ahh, History 1300)
Song of the Day: The More I Seek You- Kari Jobe
-Max Lucado
Do you ever wonder what the point is? Do you ever wonder if you'll ever be anything more than what you are?
When I was little, my mom used to tell me I was special. The same way, I suppose, that all mothers tell their children they're special. But I always believed her because of the story that went along with it. You see, before I came along, my mom was pregnant with her first child, Jamie. Jamie, unfortunately, never made it into the world. You can imagine the disappointment and heartbreak expectant parents feel when this happens, but God always has a plan, through the good times and the bad. Shortly afterward, my mom found out she was pregnant with me.
So she always used to tell me that there was a reason I was born instead. That although it was painful for her to lose Jamie, if she hadn't, I wouldn't be here. And that, she told me, made me special. It meant I was here for a particular reason. It meant that I would be important. And this made sense to me. It truly made me believe that I was destined for great things. That I would make a difference in the world. That I really would, someday, be special.
As I grew up I came to realize that there was nothing particularly interesting or different about me. I didn't feel special yet. I had big dreams, though, and I held on to those dreams, thinking they would be the difference. If I just followed my heart, kept my plans, chased my dreams, and didn't give up, I would become someone and I would find that meaning I was longing to find. The reason I was here.
Recently, I've been struggling with a similar feeling. The why-am-I-here feeling. Feeling like maybe there's no point to my life; after all, I've never done anything of worth, and who's to say I ever will? What if I never do anything of worth? What if I'm running out of time? During an emotional conversation with my mom last weekend, this feeling made a reappearance, and I mentioned it to her. She replied that it wasn't about me; whether or not I did something people would remember or did something that changed the world wasn't the important thing. It was about God and His plan, and He knows what he's doing. Every person on this Earth was put here for a reason, and each and every one one of us has a purpose. Just because you're not aware of what it is doesn't mean it doesn't exist. After all, you have no idea of the lives you've touched in your lifetime. You have no idea of who you've affected and how you've done so, or who may have had a better life, day, or even just couple of moments because of something you've done.
And I realize that she's right. I may never do anything that will change the course of history. I may never cure a disease, step onto a Broadway stage, paint a valuable painting, voice a Disney character, travel into space, write a book that makes people think differently about things. But somehow, sometime, to someone, I will make a difference. And isn't that reason enough to believe that I matter?
It's hard sometimes, to remember that your life isn't all about you and whether or not people will remember your name. It's about so many more things. You, of course, are an extremely important part of it. But it's also about every person you come in contact with, everything you do, and the One who gave you life. Sometimes it just takes remembering this to see how much you mean.
Currently reading: Survival in Auschwitz by Primo Levi (Ahh, History 1300)
Song of the Day: The More I Seek You- Kari Jobe
Thursday, April 5, 2012
BEDA 4/5: If that's the way you love, you've got to learn so much.
Hey everyone.
Truthfully, I do not want to be writing this post right now. I'm in a terrible mood and I'm in a hurry and I just want to cry or scream or punch a pillow.
Do you ever get in those moods where you feel like the entire world has offended you, even though an argument with one person is all that caused it? I don't know why, but this happens to me fairly often.
I like to consider myself a generally happy person, but far more often that I'm proud of, I fall prey to ridiculous, pointless mood swings. I become irritable and grouchy and particularly sensitive. It's not a personality trait I've proud of, but not I've been able to shake so far. It rarely happens around my friends. For the most part, it happens with my family; the people I'm closest to. Not very loving behavior, I realize. I'm not sure if it's just because because they've seen me at my worst anyway, so I'm less worried about them seeing that side of me, or if it's because I'm just around them so much, or what. I wish I knew how to get rid of it, though.
Do you any of you have this problem? Do you have any suggestions on how to . . . keep it from happening, I guess?
I know a lot of people say that it's a choice. Choose to be happy. Choose not to be upset, annoyed, angry, sad, etc. But I guess that often feels impossible in the moment. Does this make me ridiculous? Juvenile? Immature? I don't know.
Sorry for the downer of a post, again. I really need to work on this blogging thing. I do feel better, though. So thanks.
Currently reading: Nothing. SO MUCH SCHOOLWORK.
Song of the Day: Disney Animazement Trio
Truthfully, I do not want to be writing this post right now. I'm in a terrible mood and I'm in a hurry and I just want to cry or scream or punch a pillow.
Do you ever get in those moods where you feel like the entire world has offended you, even though an argument with one person is all that caused it? I don't know why, but this happens to me fairly often.
I like to consider myself a generally happy person, but far more often that I'm proud of, I fall prey to ridiculous, pointless mood swings. I become irritable and grouchy and particularly sensitive. It's not a personality trait I've proud of, but not I've been able to shake so far. It rarely happens around my friends. For the most part, it happens with my family; the people I'm closest to. Not very loving behavior, I realize. I'm not sure if it's just because because they've seen me at my worst anyway, so I'm less worried about them seeing that side of me, or if it's because I'm just around them so much, or what. I wish I knew how to get rid of it, though.
Do you any of you have this problem? Do you have any suggestions on how to . . . keep it from happening, I guess?
I know a lot of people say that it's a choice. Choose to be happy. Choose not to be upset, annoyed, angry, sad, etc. But I guess that often feels impossible in the moment. Does this make me ridiculous? Juvenile? Immature? I don't know.
Sorry for the downer of a post, again. I really need to work on this blogging thing. I do feel better, though. So thanks.
Currently reading: Nothing. SO MUCH SCHOOLWORK.
Song of the Day: Disney Animazement Trio
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
BEDA 4/4: Let's get down to business to defeat the calories.
Good evening everyone! I just got home from Zumba* for the first time in a while. I used to go four times a week, and I was thinking about getting certified to teach, but this semester I've just been busy and out of it and haven't been attending. Sometime during my absence, our cool-down songs at the end of class went from being popular songs played on the radio to Disney songs. I go to two different Zumba classes on Wednesdays, one hour-long class and one half hour-long class, both taught by the same sisters. During the first class we cooled down to Can You Feel the Love Tonight from Lion King (the movie version, which I love several times more than the Elton John one) and in the second class we cooled down to one of my favorite Disney songs from my favorite Disney movie: A Whole New World from Aladdin.
If you know me at all, you know I was geeking out like a child in a candy store about my instructors playing Disney music, and While A Whole New World was playing, I started thinking. If I got that excited about dancing/stretching to one Disney song, how cool would it be to work out to lots of them?
A plan began to formulate in my head, and after class I went up to Alysa, my instructor, and said "I need to start a Disney-themed fitness class where we work out to Disney music and use choreography from or inspired by the movies." I was mostly saying it casually, almost as a joke, but she looked at me and said "I would go to that."
A few girls behind me, stragglers from the class that had just ended, overheard what I was saying, and said they would definitely go to it as well. A few girls said their whole sorority would go to something like that. I was really surprised; it was just a silly, nerdy thing that I'd thought up and I didn't really think people would be interested in it. But they were, and it really excited me. Alysa told me to email the woman who runs the fitness center on campus (where my zumba classes are held) and let her know my idea. I could work on what I would do in the class over summer break and apply for a position in the fall, and if the people who run the center like it, I could actually do this. A Disney-themed fitness/dance class.
The idea is super exciting to me. I've never done any choreography and don't know how good I would be at it, but I've got a few months to work on the idea and find out if it's something I could actually do. But if it does work out, I would be teaching, getting into shape (which I desperately need), listening to Disney music, and getting paid to do it all. I can't imagine how awesome that would be.
Anyway, I just really wanted to share this with you guys. I don't know if it's going to happen or not, but I'm really excited about it and wanted to see what you all thought. If you have suggestions or ideas be sure to let me know in the comments!
Love you all and hope you have a wonderful night.
<3
*In case you haven't heard of Zumba, it's a type of dance/fitness class that combines different types of Latin dance and puts it to pop or hip hop music. It's a lot of fun and burns a lot of calories.
Currently reading: Everyone's BEDA posts!
Song of the Day: 21 Guns- American Idiot (Also Green Day but I was listening to the musical version)
Number of fitness classes attended today: 4 I'M A (not quite) LEAN, (not really) MEAN, CALORIE KICKIN' MACHINE
If you know me at all, you know I was geeking out like a child in a candy store about my instructors playing Disney music, and While A Whole New World was playing, I started thinking. If I got that excited about dancing/stretching to one Disney song, how cool would it be to work out to lots of them?
A plan began to formulate in my head, and after class I went up to Alysa, my instructor, and said "I need to start a Disney-themed fitness class where we work out to Disney music and use choreography from or inspired by the movies." I was mostly saying it casually, almost as a joke, but she looked at me and said "I would go to that."
A few girls behind me, stragglers from the class that had just ended, overheard what I was saying, and said they would definitely go to it as well. A few girls said their whole sorority would go to something like that. I was really surprised; it was just a silly, nerdy thing that I'd thought up and I didn't really think people would be interested in it. But they were, and it really excited me. Alysa told me to email the woman who runs the fitness center on campus (where my zumba classes are held) and let her know my idea. I could work on what I would do in the class over summer break and apply for a position in the fall, and if the people who run the center like it, I could actually do this. A Disney-themed fitness/dance class.
The idea is super exciting to me. I've never done any choreography and don't know how good I would be at it, but I've got a few months to work on the idea and find out if it's something I could actually do. But if it does work out, I would be teaching, getting into shape (which I desperately need), listening to Disney music, and getting paid to do it all. I can't imagine how awesome that would be.
Anyway, I just really wanted to share this with you guys. I don't know if it's going to happen or not, but I'm really excited about it and wanted to see what you all thought. If you have suggestions or ideas be sure to let me know in the comments!
Love you all and hope you have a wonderful night.
<3
*In case you haven't heard of Zumba, it's a type of dance/fitness class that combines different types of Latin dance and puts it to pop or hip hop music. It's a lot of fun and burns a lot of calories.
Currently reading: Everyone's BEDA posts!
Song of the Day: 21 Guns- American Idiot (Also Green Day but I was listening to the musical version)
Number of fitness classes attended today: 4 I'M A (not quite) LEAN, (not really) MEAN, CALORIE KICKIN' MACHINE
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
BEDA 4/3: I don't even know what to title this.
Today was an interesting day. And when I say interesting, I mean terribly uninteresting. I overslept and didn't go to class. (I really need to stop doing that.) I sat around and finished watching every last BetOnTheShnooks video on Youtube. I (UNINTENTIONALLY) stumbled upon ANOTHER old Youtube channel belonging to a Youtuber I really enjoy, one of the aforementioned Shnooks. I baked some cookies. I recorded my first VLODA video. I spent lots of time playing guitar. And I was bored out of my mind.
My sister left at around 8 this morning to visit her boyfriend at his school, which is roughly ten hours away (!) in the upper peninsula. My dad, who I spend a fair amount of time with, despite living most of the time with my mom, left last night for work and will not be back until Friday. My mom works overtime and usually doesn't get home until around 7:30, and then goes on her computer for a bit and goes to bed. And all my friends live too far away for me to see.
This results in a lonely week for me. I get quite used to being on my own, because the only person I really ever hang out with is my sister. I have a lot of friends online, and a few close ones IRL, but every single one in both categories lives far enough away that I can't see them without planning a roadtrip to do so.
And on days like today make me wonder what I'm doing wrong. I'm a really friendly person, and I talk to many people, but I can never seem to make friends of the sort that you spend time with. Most of my friends IRL are more like acquaintances, not someone I would call up to go to a show with me or to hang out with or whatever. I'm a bit shy when meeting newer people, but I become comfortable with people fairly quickly. I'm just not sure how to make friends that I can actually spend time with outside of school or church or dance or work.
It's just weird, because back in high school, I had a TON of friends. I wasn't popular by any stretch of the imagination, but I had friends everywhere. I was always going to sleepovers or bonfires or parties (not the crazy ones, fear not), I always had friends to hang out with after school or during the summer or on spring break or the weekends. I always had someone to talk to during class or sit with at lunch. And I was really happy. I know people say high school shouldn't be the best time of your life, but for me, it really was. I was the happiest then and I had the most going on and some of the best memories of my life. But since I've graduated, I've lost touch with almost everyone from high school. I know this is normal for most people, but most people seem to make new friends during college, many times friends that they keep for a long time after graduating. I haven't been able to form any close friendships with people in my university. I've met and made friends with a lot of people I absolutely love, but they mostly end up being the kind of friend you say hi to when you run into them on campus and wish them a happy birthday on Facebook and that's it. I guess I just miss having fun, you know? I feel like I don't have a lot of fun anymore.
Is this a problem that other people have? Or is it just me? I wish I knew how to correct it. I'm not really sure I remember how to form close friendships with people IRL, because I'm so used to the kind of relationships you form online, and how they become close relationships (or as close as they can get without actually having met the person) so easily. If you have any advice on the matter, I'd love to hear it.
I'm sorry if this post was kind of a downer, it's just something that's been on my mind a lot lately and been bothering me.
Hope you're all doing well and enjoying your week.
Currently reading: The Magician's Nephew by C.S. Lewis
Song of the Day: Lupin's Tale- Oliver Boyd and the Remembralls
My sister left at around 8 this morning to visit her boyfriend at his school, which is roughly ten hours away (!) in the upper peninsula. My dad, who I spend a fair amount of time with, despite living most of the time with my mom, left last night for work and will not be back until Friday. My mom works overtime and usually doesn't get home until around 7:30, and then goes on her computer for a bit and goes to bed. And all my friends live too far away for me to see.
This results in a lonely week for me. I get quite used to being on my own, because the only person I really ever hang out with is my sister. I have a lot of friends online, and a few close ones IRL, but every single one in both categories lives far enough away that I can't see them without planning a roadtrip to do so.
And on days like today make me wonder what I'm doing wrong. I'm a really friendly person, and I talk to many people, but I can never seem to make friends of the sort that you spend time with. Most of my friends IRL are more like acquaintances, not someone I would call up to go to a show with me or to hang out with or whatever. I'm a bit shy when meeting newer people, but I become comfortable with people fairly quickly. I'm just not sure how to make friends that I can actually spend time with outside of school or church or dance or work.
It's just weird, because back in high school, I had a TON of friends. I wasn't popular by any stretch of the imagination, but I had friends everywhere. I was always going to sleepovers or bonfires or parties (not the crazy ones, fear not), I always had friends to hang out with after school or during the summer or on spring break or the weekends. I always had someone to talk to during class or sit with at lunch. And I was really happy. I know people say high school shouldn't be the best time of your life, but for me, it really was. I was the happiest then and I had the most going on and some of the best memories of my life. But since I've graduated, I've lost touch with almost everyone from high school. I know this is normal for most people, but most people seem to make new friends during college, many times friends that they keep for a long time after graduating. I haven't been able to form any close friendships with people in my university. I've met and made friends with a lot of people I absolutely love, but they mostly end up being the kind of friend you say hi to when you run into them on campus and wish them a happy birthday on Facebook and that's it. I guess I just miss having fun, you know? I feel like I don't have a lot of fun anymore.
Is this a problem that other people have? Or is it just me? I wish I knew how to correct it. I'm not really sure I remember how to form close friendships with people IRL, because I'm so used to the kind of relationships you form online, and how they become close relationships (or as close as they can get without actually having met the person) so easily. If you have any advice on the matter, I'd love to hear it.
I'm sorry if this post was kind of a downer, it's just something that's been on my mind a lot lately and been bothering me.
Hope you're all doing well and enjoying your week.
Currently reading: The Magician's Nephew by C.S. Lewis
Song of the Day: Lupin's Tale- Oliver Boyd and the Remembralls
BEDA 4/2: You here to finish me off, sweetheart?
Today, I went to see The Hunger Games in theatres for the second time. The first time I saw it was, of course, at midnight the day it came out. (Remember how I'm a nerd and everything?) But my dad hadn't yet seen it and wanted to, so I went again to see it with him this morning. I never did get around to vlogging or blogging about it the first time, so I thought I'd take this opportunity to share my opinions on how I felt about the movie.
This review WILL contain spoilers, so if you haven't read the books (all three books, probably), you might want to skip this one.
First of all, I need to say that it was the best book-to-movie adaptation I've ever seen. I heard this before I even saw it, but it was absolutely true. I have never seen a movie stay so close to the book it was adapted from. It's not possible for them to include everything, but even after seeing it a second time, I can't think of anything they left out that was super important or will have a big effect on the next two movies.
There were a few things I would have liked them to keep in, like Peeta finding out at the end that Katniss's affection was all just part of the Games, and the mutts having dead tribute's eyes, the fact that Katniss's mother is a sort of doctor and that Prim helps her tend to the sick and wounded (it just seems like this comes up a lot in all three books, and I feel that it would have made us see Prim as a stronger character), the rest of Peeta's story about the first day he met Katniss and how the birds fell silent when she sang, as well as a few other things. But although I would have loved to see these things in the movie, none of them were truly big enough to make much of a difference to the plot or the furthering of the story.
For the most part, the important things were there, and the most important thing- the emotional chaos you go through while reading- translated fabulously to the screen. I sat in shock and tears for most of my first viewing of this movie, laughing rarely. Not because there were no funny parts, because there were quite a few, but because the movie did such a fantastic job of sucking me in and making me feel exactly what it was meant to make me feel. Horror. Disgust. Sadness. Shock. I felt the same way I imagine any citizen of Panem, besides the citizens of the Capitol, would feel watching their very own people go off to fight to their almost certain death. It was amazing the way it affected me just as strongly as the book had. And Jennifer Lawrence's performance as Katniss was absolutely brilliant. I believed 100% that she was our Girl on Fire.
I may write another post on a different day about the different things they added to the movie that were not in the books. Mostly little things, but a lot of little things that I really loved. But this is it for now, and I need to get to bed.
Happy April, and may the odds be ever in your favor.
Currently reading: The Magician's Nephew by C.S. Lewis
Song of the Day: Over You- Miranda Lambert
This review WILL contain spoilers, so if you haven't read the books (all three books, probably), you might want to skip this one.
First of all, I need to say that it was the best book-to-movie adaptation I've ever seen. I heard this before I even saw it, but it was absolutely true. I have never seen a movie stay so close to the book it was adapted from. It's not possible for them to include everything, but even after seeing it a second time, I can't think of anything they left out that was super important or will have a big effect on the next two movies.
There were a few things I would have liked them to keep in, like Peeta finding out at the end that Katniss's affection was all just part of the Games, and the mutts having dead tribute's eyes, the fact that Katniss's mother is a sort of doctor and that Prim helps her tend to the sick and wounded (it just seems like this comes up a lot in all three books, and I feel that it would have made us see Prim as a stronger character), the rest of Peeta's story about the first day he met Katniss and how the birds fell silent when she sang, as well as a few other things. But although I would have loved to see these things in the movie, none of them were truly big enough to make much of a difference to the plot or the furthering of the story.
For the most part, the important things were there, and the most important thing- the emotional chaos you go through while reading- translated fabulously to the screen. I sat in shock and tears for most of my first viewing of this movie, laughing rarely. Not because there were no funny parts, because there were quite a few, but because the movie did such a fantastic job of sucking me in and making me feel exactly what it was meant to make me feel. Horror. Disgust. Sadness. Shock. I felt the same way I imagine any citizen of Panem, besides the citizens of the Capitol, would feel watching their very own people go off to fight to their almost certain death. It was amazing the way it affected me just as strongly as the book had. And Jennifer Lawrence's performance as Katniss was absolutely brilliant. I believed 100% that she was our Girl on Fire.
I may write another post on a different day about the different things they added to the movie that were not in the books. Mostly little things, but a lot of little things that I really loved. But this is it for now, and I need to get to bed.
Happy April, and may the odds be ever in your favor.
Currently reading: The Magician's Nephew by C.S. Lewis
Song of the Day: Over You- Miranda Lambert
Monday, April 2, 2012
BEDA 4/1 (Sorta)
Well, well. It's been quite a while, hasn't it, everyone? Quite a while. I have been slacking largely on my blogging duties, but I am BACK for at least thirty days in a row!* Yeah!
Anyway, since it's been so long (and also because I really want to go to sleep) I thought I would do another sort of introduction blog post. So here are (some of) the things you should know about me! In an quick and easy list, true to slacker form!
-I am a Christian
-I am a nerdfighter
-I am OBSESSED with Disney. I mean it. Obsessed.
-I am in my third year of college, majoring in English
-I write a lot and read way more
-I sing about as much as I speak
-I love Harry Potter
-I also love television. Mostly the British kind, but also the American kind.
-I make videos on Youtube
-Sometimes I make songs and then I put those songs in my videos on Youtube
-I've been working at McDonalds for seven years. I don't want to talk about it.
-I have three cats and am well on my way to becoming the crazy cat lady
-My ultimate, most unrealistic dream is to voice a Disney princess
-I really like speaking in accents that are not my own, however, nobody likes hearing someone speak in horribly done foreign accents.
-I am really tired and seeing The Hunger Games again with my dad in six hours and should probably get some sleep
These are some big things you should know about me. Now we're friends!** Tomorrow I will write a proper blog post, I promise. Although it is 4:11... look, it's tomorrow!*** Also, although I am not doing VEDA this month, I'm doing VLODA, which stands for both "Vlog Lots of Days in April" and "I Am a Slacker Who Has Already Failed VEDA on the First Day." My youtube channel is youtube.com/myxgiftxisxmyxsong if you're interested in keeping up with me there.
Anyway, until tomorrow!
*Not a guarantee
**That's how it works, right? Or do I still have to ask if you want to play?****
***That one's for you, Jordan and Justine.
****That sounds creepier than it is. I promise it's a reference. Ask Maureen Johnson.
Currently reading: The Chronicles of Narnia- The Magician's Nephew by C.S. Lewis
Song of the Day: The Disney Dreams show at Disneyland Paris (IT COUNTS.)
Number of times I have called myself a slacker in this post: 3. It's the magic number, my friends.
Anyway, since it's been so long (and also because I really want to go to sleep) I thought I would do another sort of introduction blog post. So here are (some of) the things you should know about me! In an quick and easy list, true to slacker form!
-I am a Christian
-I am a nerdfighter
-I am OBSESSED with Disney. I mean it. Obsessed.
-I am in my third year of college, majoring in English
-I write a lot and read way more
-I sing about as much as I speak
-I love Harry Potter
-I also love television. Mostly the British kind, but also the American kind.
-I make videos on Youtube
-Sometimes I make songs and then I put those songs in my videos on Youtube
-I've been working at McDonalds for seven years. I don't want to talk about it.
-I have three cats and am well on my way to becoming the crazy cat lady
-My ultimate, most unrealistic dream is to voice a Disney princess
-I really like speaking in accents that are not my own, however, nobody likes hearing someone speak in horribly done foreign accents.
-I am really tired and seeing The Hunger Games again with my dad in six hours and should probably get some sleep
These are some big things you should know about me. Now we're friends!** Tomorrow I will write a proper blog post, I promise. Although it is 4:11... look, it's tomorrow!*** Also, although I am not doing VEDA this month, I'm doing VLODA, which stands for both "Vlog Lots of Days in April" and "I Am a Slacker Who Has Already Failed VEDA on the First Day." My youtube channel is youtube.com/myxgiftxisxmyxsong if you're interested in keeping up with me there.
Anyway, until tomorrow!
*Not a guarantee
**That's how it works, right? Or do I still have to ask if you want to play?****
***That one's for you, Jordan and Justine.
****That sounds creepier than it is. I promise it's a reference. Ask Maureen Johnson.
Currently reading: The Chronicles of Narnia- The Magician's Nephew by C.S. Lewis
Song of the Day: The Disney Dreams show at Disneyland Paris (IT COUNTS.)
Number of times I have called myself a slacker in this post: 3. It's the magic number, my friends.
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